singlegirl's Diaryland Diary
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Living at Home Part 2
I�ve been living with my parents for a little over a week and it�s not too bad. I leave for work at 7:30 am. I workout until 7 pm after work, eat dinner with them (a healthy, homemade meal courtesy of my mom) and then go to the playroom (separate upstairs from the rest of the house) and watch TV for an hour or so. Rinse and repeat.
And while I don�t really have my freedom, I have a lot more money. It�s like I exchanged one for another.
Sometimes though I wonder what the 18 year old me would think of the 30 year old me. I�m sure I would have been horrified knowing that in 12 years time I would be moving back home. Awesome. It�s only temporary. It�s only temporary.
Work is fine. Working out is fine. I�m still right above the 200 pound mark. I can�t seem to shake it. I was running (and running only) for months. I ran my two mini marathons and took a bit of a break.
I ate SO much while I was training. I was running a marathon each week in mileage and was constantly starving. So I ate a lot. And didn�t gain, but didn�t lose. Kind of sad that I ran that much and didn�t lose weight.
Next time I�m in hardcore training, I need to research what kinds of foods I should be eating. How many calories and how often. That might help. I just kind of winged it and did everything on my own.
So anyway, I�m mixing it up now. This week alone, I�ve ran twice, did a walk/run with my mom, did the Arc, elliptical and a spinning class. I�m also lifting weights again and tomorrow I�m doing Zumba and a chair Pilates class. Shocking my body with lots of different things.
I�m going to join a training program for my next two mini marathons. It freaking stars next week. The last one I ran was a month ago today. I need more of a break, but I really want to train with professionals to see how much better I feel. Plus they will talk about nutrition.
I�m not sure I�m ready to be in training again though. And the next mini isn�t until October. Doesn�t that seem really, really far away? I�m doing a second mini two weeks after that. Both are also marathons, but I�m not sure I�m ready to run 26 miles. Although if I train from now until October, we�ll see�
My goal is to weigh under 200 pounds (which was also my goal last freaking September � good for me for not gaining, but SO sad that I haven�t lost more) before I leave for Texas. I leave July 9th. Today I weighed 205, but I�m going to start my period tomorrow, so it could be anywhere from 200 � 205, really. But I want to be solidly under 200. Like 195 (or I�ll take 190).
Not sure why I�m getting all cocky about it�considering I haven�t lost (or to be honest, have lost and gained the same 4 pounds since September) a single pound in months.
Michael. I love him. I wish I didn�t. Loving him means moving to Texas. Nothing against Texas, but my entire life is here. But I can�t live my life for my friends and family. I have to do this. I have to see what this could be. If it doesn�t work out, then I will have friends and family to come home to.
This has been such a different relationship for me. I fall head over heels in love and am reckless about it. This time we dated (not exclusively) from October � April. And just the past two months have we been exclusive. We were both hoping that what we feel for each other would fade.
And because we are forced to do most of our interacting over the phone, I know him so well. We talk for hours a week. And when we do see each other, it�s electric. We touch and it makes me tingle. It�s just different. And he feels the same way.
We haven�t said �I love you� yet. I think it�ll happen this time in Texas. We are both so guarded about our feelings. We�re scared and are kind of shocked that it happened like this. I didn�t think I would ever move to Texas for someone.
Until I met him, I hadn�t even been anywhere near the state of Texas. I love it there (well, I�ve only been to Dallas � he now lives in Austin and I heard it�s even cooler) though. It really looks (at least the suburbs near Dallas) a lot like Indianapolis.
I think I expected ranches and desert and cowboys, but it looked like I could be in any Indianapolis suburb. That was actually kind of disappointing.
I can�t wait to see him though. 5 days and nights together in a hotel in downtown Austin. I�m going to meet his mom and stepdad for the first time. I�m really nervous about that. His mom doesn�t think he should be dating really since he�s technically not divorced yet (he will be by the end of this month though � so the next time I see him, he will not have a wife � that�s kind of exciting).
Also his mom and dad separated and his dad started dating someone immediately (which is exactly what happened with Michael and I) and his mom was so upset, she hit his step-mom, Pam (who I�ve met and like a lot). In our relationship, I�m Pam and his (ex) wife is his mom. That�s already one huge strike against me.
So yeah�it�ll be interesting. I just want her to like me. I�m a really nice and caring person and I just hope she�ll remember that when she meets me.
A note to myself (for my next entry, or I won�t remember): how Michael and I are kind of each other�s rebound person (but hopefully not really) and what his mom said about me staying at their house (Michael also moved home temporarily) during my upcoming visit.
Lastly a photo of Michael and I during his last visit (ignore the massive amount of cleavage I�m showing � and yes, Michael thinks it�s hilarious to tell me that he�s going to show it to him mom before I come � can you imagine?!?).
8:58 p.m. - June 17, 2008
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