singlegirl's Diaryland Diary

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Emails to the Ex.

Where do I start? This is going to be a long one. Sorry.

Let�s start with Jeremy. We had a few exchanges of emails. I will post them all...it�s kind of a lot � here goes.

My first one to him...

Hi Jeremy,

I found a watch when I was cleaning out my trunk. I think it might have belonged to your grandfather. I'm assuming you would like it back. I tried to call you, but I think either I don't remember your number or you have a new one. Anyway, if this watch belongs to you and you would like it back, please let me know.

Thanks,
Liz

His response...

Hi Liz,

I am happy to hear from you. I have been thinking
about you a lot lately. I have wanted to contact you.

But I was scared to call you and I was unsure to
write you.

I am most certain that watch was my grandfathers. I
have yet to go through my things from when I left down
there. But yes, I would like to get it from you. If
it will save you time and effort. I can drive down
there and pick it up. Unless you really don't care to
see me.

I believe that you did call me. But it came up a
private number. I went to answer it and no one was
there. But just in case, here is my number.
260-XXX-XXXX

Have a nice holiday
Jeremy

And my response to him...

Jeremy,

I can mail the watch - no sense in you driving to pick it up. Are you still staying with your parents? What is their address again?

It's best that you didn't contact me. I was/am pretty angry with you. I felt/feel like you screwed me over once again. It's my fault though. I'm a dumbass who thought that you actually meant it when you said you would like to try to work things out to get back together. It was a slap in the face when you decided to go out and get a girlfriend and then you "told" me by ignoring me and not returning my calls.

After the years we were together and all that we've been through, especially lately, I just thought I deserved better. Especially after I was so kind to you after you screwed me over the first time.

Lesson learned though. Shame on me for taking so long to learn it.

I'm slowly letting go of my anger and hate, but it still just makes me so sad that my supposed "best friend" treated me like that.

I'm sure that you and your new girlfriend are happy now and that's fine, but for your sake, you better hope that what goes around doesn't come right back around.

Guess you can tell I'm still a little angry, huh?

Liz

His response to me...

Liz,

I would appreciate it if you could send me my grandfathers watch. Thank you very much. I have been thinking a lot about what I did to you. And I was terribly wrong for treating you the way that I did. I was a horrible person at that time in my life. I was stressed out about the past that I left behind here, that I didn't care about my future.

I am slowly changing my ways. I am looking inside instead of outside for answers. I was baptized a while ago. I thought about that after I moved up here. And I feel good about my decision. I hope that in due time, becoming one with God makes me become a better person.

Everyday that passes I think about what I did to you. I have put myself in your shoes. From what you have told me, it makes me feel sick to my stomach the things that happened. It saddens me that I treated a human being that way. I wish and pray that one day you will forgive me.

I am still staying at my parents. At least until I pay off my debt. I am so ready to take the next step in my life. I will always keep you in my thoughts and prays. Here is my parents address. Thank you again for doing this. Take care.

Jeremy

And lastly, my response to him...

Hmmm, obviously you are still dating the preacher�s daughter...

I�m trying really, really hard not to be angry with you, but to be honest, when I first read your email, my reaction was, �Fuck you.�

You act like what happened between us was so long ago. We last saw each other, and slept together, less than 2 months ago. And it wasn�t like you made one mistake � you continually screwed me over again and again and again.

I�m not the first person this happened to either. You did the same thing to Wendy. I just think it�s sad that it took yet another girl for you to �change.� You�ll never change. You don�t change for you, you change so that the person you�re with will like you better.

I think it�s sad that you are using God as a way to get a girlfriend. And to seek forgiveness from someone you treated so awfully.

You are still being phony. You really need to grow up and figure out your own life. Stop using girls in your attempt to be happy.

You can pray for whoever you want to, but in all honesty, you need it the most. Meanwhile, we should all pray for your new girlfriend. She�s going to need it.

I will send the watch back. But first, you should mail a check (mail it to XXXXXX). Tim told me that you owed him $90. You know he needs the money. Since you�re on the up and up with God, do you think you can find it in your heart to mail him the money? When I get the check (made out to him), I�ll mail you the watch.

And know that this is my last act of kindness towards you. I�ve given you way more than you deserve. I think God would even side with me on this one.

Liz

Well...that�s where we are now. I am pretty proud of my last email. I just got tired of being nice and forgiving. Sometimes you just want to tell people to fuck off, you know? I can�t believe he�s now �with God.� What a jackass.

I�ll share my other news in a separate email. This is too long as it is.

2:45 p.m. - September 05, 2006

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