singlegirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Should I Start Selling Drugs? Rob a Bank? I�m grumpy. Disheartened. Pissed off. When is it going to be my turn? I should learn not to believe that something good would happen to me. I need to stop getting my hopes up � it never works that way. Jeremy�s job interview was this morning and he is one of 40 applicants. If he were to get the job (doubtful), then he would be responsible for bringing in his own clients (he has 0 of his own personal clients, unless you count the Pac3rs). So basically, this job. This dream job that was going to change my entire life? Is not happening. But of course, why should it? I guess I just stupidly thought that if I prayed hard enough and believed hard enough, then this would happen. Fuck it. *** In other fantastic news, Jeremy might get fired from his job. I don�t really blame him � his work is horrific. First off, it�s almost an hour away. Secondly, they make them take 2 hour non-paid lunches. So, basically he�s gone for 12 hours, but only getting paid for 8. His bosses are AWFUL. They yell for no reason, expect their staff to work insane hours (he�s on 12 days straight) and are racist. Yes, the doctor and his wife (who is the office manager) refer to their black clients as �N******.� There is also a young girl (23 or so) who does not get along with Jeremy. Yesterday Jeremy had a flat tire and the doctor told him that since they were slow, he could change it. He was walking out the door to do so, when Elizabeth yelled at him and made him come back inside. Jeremy�s not one to take shit, especially from a young girl, who is not his boss, so he ripped her a new one (sorry, I hate that expression). Unfortunately for him, Elizabeth is the favorite of the doctor and his wife and she is going to try to get him fired. I haven�t heard from him yet today, but I wouldn�t be surprised if it�s in the works. If I ever see her out, I might have to do something evil. Sadly, if Jeremy gets fired and we can barely make rent, let alone pay our bills or buy food, I probably won�t be above bitch slapping her, slashing tires, etc. I�m just so sick of getting shit on all the time. I actually have a fantasy of seeing her out at the bars and ordering a large cranberry juice. When she goes to the bathroom, I throw the drink over the stall and walk out. How awesome would that be?!? Plus I�ve never ever done anything mean or bad (I never got a detention in school, and I haven�t ever been pulled over for speeding or anything. Not even a warning). I�m SUCH a good girl � I�m tired of it. We�ll see what happens. Expect the worse, right? I guess there�s always food stamps. *** I really have nothing positive to say right now. I�m going to get drunk tonight (for free) so that�s a good thing, right? It�s Girls Night. We have breakfast casserole (eggs, sausage and hash browns), homemade cinnamon bread, fresh fruit and lots and lots of mimosas (plus one case of beer and 2 huge boxes of wine � yes, we�re classy) for 10 girls. My friend is picking me up at 4 and Jeremy is coming to get me at 11. Nice. I am also going to get drunk for free on Saturday. My friend (who is well off, to say the least) lives in a nice neighborhood (with professional athletes and Indy car drivers) and they have a block party every year and can invite friends. There will be kegs, jell-o shots, food and a live band. How fun is that?!? *** Okay, can you tell I�m just slightly obsessed with money today?!? I just want my chance. I don�t even want to be rich. This is what I want�a house (3 bedroom, 2 full bath, fenced in back yard), a yearly vacation (we can drive to Florida for all I care) and enough money to pay for bills without having to freak out every paycheck. Is that too much to ask? I also want to start a family, but don�t want children before I�m married. It�s just my personal choice. However, since Jeremy and I cannot afford to get married, this might not ever happen. Especially since (and yes, I know I�ve said this before) I only have 8 years (at the most, probably) to have my entire family. That�s not a long time. I want 3 kids, spaced approximately 2 years apart. That�s 7 years right there. Basically I have one year to find money, find a house, get married and get pregnant. Damn, I screwed. And yes, I know there is more than money, and I am truly grateful for everything I have, but seriously. I just want a chance. *** Lastly, beachbride06 (aka jennlynn24), please turn on your notes section so I can leave you some love! 1:43 p.m. - August 25, 2005 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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