singlegirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Money = HATE Jeremy and I had a bad weekend � it was our worst one yet. We just didn�t get along at all, and I started to question us. Things are better now, but now something else has been thrown our way. Last night we went to my older brother�s house for some financial advice. I�m so tired of living paycheck to paycheck � and not really owning anything (house, furniture, etc). My older brother is a banker and was willing to meet with us and go over our monthly income and expenses. Mine wasn�t too bad (shockingly). After paying everything (including budgeting $100 for groceries, clothes and entertainment � each), I have $500 (not including my second job, which pays $200 tax-free a month) left. That�s good, right? Oh, and my credit is pretty good too � I only have one negative item on my credit report (you can get free credit checks � one per year � at annualcreditreport.com). Jeremy�s financial situation, however, is horrendous. He has been late paying some of his bills - he owes almost $3,000 in late fees. He has 1 credit card, 1 car loan and 2 other loans to pay off. He has 9 negative items on his credit report (and 8 positive). His monthly expenses (not including entertainment, food or clothes), exceeds what he earns. He can�t pay for rent, utilities, his cell phone, his car, insurance and his loans. He�s under by almost $200 a month. So, what is our solution? He�s going to consolidate is loans and hopefully just have to make one payment (without the interest) a month � but he�s so far in the hole, that I�m not sure that they�re going to do it. He�s also going to have to find a better paying job � he�s officially graduated, so he is now a certified massage therapist. It�s not easy finding a job. It takes time, and in the meantime, what is he going to do? Keep paying his bills late I guess. I just hope I can cheerfully pay for all of our food, entertainment and clothes without resenting him. I think it would be different if we were married, but without any �guarantee,� I feel strange. What if in a year, he decides to move on and I spent thousands of dollars on him? I don�t think that will happen, but you never know. It just sucks because we�re not getting any younger and I want to buy a house, get married and have a family. We can�t do any of that until he gets his shit together (yes, I realize I�m not doing a very good job at not being resentful). I waited for him to get done with school and now I�m waiting for him to get ready financially � is it worth it? How come the men I date are never �ready�? And yes, since I am paying for most everything, I am taking control of all our finances. We have QuickBooks installed on our computer (which is not currently hooked up because our desk broke) and I�m going to be frugal and make us start saving. What a sad, horrible wake up call. I hate money � have I said that before?!? Quick pity party: Why is it that all my friends are skinny and have money to buy houses? What is wrong with me? Why is my life so much less valuable than everyone else around me? Okay, done. 2:36 p.m. - May 12, 2005 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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