singlegirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Letters and Lies I have been so freaking busy the past couple of days. I worked ALL weekend � it sucked! Jeremy was so wonderful though � he worked 7 hours on Saturday and 3 hours on Sunday with me. The kids who came to volunteer loved him and he bought them Dairy Queen as a treat when they were finished. Other than working, we went to dinner and had a few drinks on Saturday night and on Sunday we attempted to go to the drive-in but couldn�t find it. Seriously we are retarded. According to the directions, we were supposed to take 65 South to exit 114. We could not find exit 114. We went to dinner downtown first and got on 65 from there, but it was too far south because the exit started at 113 and the next one was 112. So, we went north first and then got on 65 South but this time we were too far north and started on exit 115 and went to exit 116. So yeah, we didn�t go. It would have been perfect though. It was 80 degrees and we were going to sit in his car, smoke cigarettes and watch the movie under the stars. We went to Wal-Mart instead and bought an old movie and watched it in bed. I took Tuesday off work (no PTO baby since I worked all weekend) to help Jeremy pack. He got the job and is moving here May 1st. He doesn�t actually start until the 8th, but his lease is up at the beginning of the month. I feel kind of badly about some of the things he has to get rid of, but he is moving in with me and I simply don�t have room for 3 VCR�s and 3 George Foreman Grills. If we break up, he�s screwed though. He won�t have a place to live or any furniture since we are using all of mine...I�m just glad it�s not me. Not that I think we�re going to break up, but he�s really taking a huge risk � a new job in a new city, living rent-free with a girlfriend -but not being included on the lease, and giving up most of his possessions. He�s either very much in love with me or incredibly stupid. He did do a very very stupid thing yesterday though. He has had a problem with lying to me in the past. Nothing super huge, but a lie is a lie and that is the one thing that pisses me off the most. The first one was about his smoking habit. He originally told me that he smoked a few times per week � I later found hour that he smoked pot a few times each day (he�s only smoked once since January thank God. I refuse to date a pothead. He really was very dumb back then). The other was the number of women he�s slept with. He originally told me 5, but it was really 6 (he cheated on his last girlfriend � something I really hate - but didn�t want to tell me about it). There have been a few others like that � just stupid little lies that make no sense. So, this last one? Really pissed me off. He told me that he threw away all of his ex-girlfriend�s stuff � letters, photos, and things like that. Fine, but I didn�t care. I still have my ex-boyfriend�s letters and photos in my memory box because they were once a part of my life and I�m not going to just erase it. But, if he doesn�t want to keep that stuff, I�m certainly not going to make him. So, yesterday I was packing up his stuff, and what did I come across? A fucking box of letters, photos and shit from Wendy. Again, I don�t care that he has it, but why did he tell me he threw it all away? Did I look through some of it? Yes � I shouldn�t have, but I was curious about their relationship. He hates her now �if she was so awful, why did they date for so long? Anyway, after reading her letters (some were from while they were dating and some were after they broke up) I really like her. I think we might be the same person and from what I could tell she wasn�t a bitch at all. But, I wasn�t in the relationship so I can�t really say anything about it. So, Jeremy called on his way home from class to see what I wanted for lunch and I told him I found the box. I left it on the bed, all messed up so he would know that I looked through it (I didn�t want to talk about it, but I didn�t want to lie to him either). He was upset, claimed that he really thought he threw that box out, blah blah blah. Lying to me is just so smarmy and shady and I hate it. I told him he has one more chance and after that he�s out. I was a bitch to him for a few hours, but I wanted him to know that I was so serious. You don�t fucking lie to me. I don�t do it to me, so don�t you dare disrespect me. So yeah, I�m really excited about the big move. Really I am. I just think that sometimes Jeremy just acts like a guy and doesn�t think. Want to know my last thought on the situation? I wonder if after I left today, he took all her stuff out of the garbage and took it to his parent�s house with the rest of his belongings? It�s his fault I have thoughts like that. If he didn�t lie to me, I wouldn�t have to waste my time thinking about what shady shit he�s doing behind my back. Okay, I�m done. I just HATE lying. So, that�s been my last couple of days. This weekend is my friend�s birthday and we�re taking her boss� pimped out drunk bus around town. I�m also doing the Race for the Cure walk and I might be heading up to Jeremy�s house to help him pack the rest of his stuff. Fun times. Do you think there is a conscious or subconscious significance of Jeremy keeping this box full of old love letters, poems and photos? Especially after making a big deal of �getting rid� of them? Okay, now I�m really done with that topic. 9:50 a.m. - April 22, 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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