singlegirl's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A Small Novel - Sorry! Okay�where did I leave off? Not last Thursday, but the Thursday before. It was Girls Night and the Fondue Party. I got off of work at 3:30 and cut up all the veggies and fruit until I had to leave for the party at 5:30. Once I got to BL�s house, I ended up cooking there until 7:30. After the OC, I made the chocolate fondue and went home (and by the way, there was totally enough food). I was seriously exhausted from cooking for so long and I was irritated at BL. I know she is not a cook, but she didn�t really help at all. And at one point, she made the comment about how I was bossy and controlling. Really? First off, this was her party. I helped pay for the food and did all the cooking. I truly felt like hired help (except I wasn�t getting paid). And sure, I was a little bossy, but someone had to be in charge. None of my friends cook that often and had no idea how to make fondue. Totally fine, but when I�m helping you out, don�t be a bitch. At that point, I wanted to stop everything and leave (which I should have done). The next day I emailed her and we had it out over email (I hate doing that) and things are fine. Friday was one of my best friend�s birthday � he�s the one that lives with my ex (who wasn�t there until the very end). I was ready to drink at that point and almost finished off a bottle of Three Olives (cherry flavored vodka) and coke. I was very, very drunk. At one point, Norm�s wife (Norm is my best guy friend and his wife is not one of my most favorite people) was complaining about how her husband still snuck a few cigarettes when he drank. She kicks him out of bed whenever she smells smoke on his breath and was just acting snotty about him (which made me mad). I know she�s his wife and I need to respect that, but I�ve been friends with him for 10 years. She�s known him for 2. So in my drunken state, I decided it would be a great idea to rub it in that whenever she�s out of town (she travels a lot for business) he not only smokes, but buys his own pack of cigarettes. She was livid and ended up getting mad at all the other girls for never telling her. I feel badly that I ratted out Norm, but to see her face when I told her how much he still smokes was hilarious. I haven�t talked to him since (I made her promise it wasn�t me who told), but I�m sure he knows and is probably mad at me. Oops. I seriously have the biggest mouth when I�m drunk. Saturday I went to We1ght Watchers and I was the heaviest I have ever been (so scary!). But in good news, when I weighed in last week, I lost 6 pounds (in 5 days). I love We1ght Watchers. Saturday night was the Last Cookout of the Summer, and I was so tired for partying and not sleeping that I was there from 5:30 � 8:30. I just couldn�t do it (also, I was babysitting a puppy from Thursday � Monday, so that was tiring in itself). It was a good thing I went home early because right before I fell asleep I remembered that I had to work on Sunday (we had a volunteer group come in). Last week was not a good week for me. First off all of my best friends (my college friends) went to Florida. Of course I didn�t go and I was miserable about it all week. Aside from that, I was SO busy with work and had this huge fundraising event that required 3 days of hard, physical labor and I had to work on Saturday too (yeah, I worked 7 days straight). I also got my period and had jury duty. It was a great fucking week. Sunday I did nothing. Same with yesterday (I took the day off to clean the house, buy groceries, etc � all the things I couldn�t do the past 2 weeks since I was so busy). God, last week was so bad. It was so hard doing all that physical work because I have planter faciitis (or however it�s spelled). It means that whenever I do a lot of walking around (especially carrying heavy things), my feet (heels especially) hurt so badly. I feel like I have broken glass in my feet and I�m grinding it into the bone. By the end of the day Wednesday, Friday (not Thursday because I had jury duty) and Saturday I was in so much physical pain � it was excruciating. Thank God I�m dating a massage therapist. I got massages for 5 days straight. So that brings us to this week. My friends are back and many have tried to contact me. I simply don�t want to talk to them. I don�t want to be that sad jealous girl when they talk about their trip and how tan they are. Seriously, I�m so jealous that whenever I think about it, I cry. I want to go on vacation so badly. I couldn�t go this time because a). I refuse to go on an airplane until I reach a certain weight and b). I had to do this fundraiser (this trip was very last minute � my friend�s parent�s condo had a cancellation). Maybe that makes me a bad friend, but I really can�t hear about their trip. I�m happy they had a good time and are all tan and gorgeous, but I don�t want to hear about it. I figure if I give them until Saturday, then a). we�ll be going out for my birthday and the attention will be more on me and not on their fabulous lives and b). their tans will have faded a little bit and hopefully they�ll get talking about Florida out of their system. Ugh, between working 7 days straight, all my friends being in Florida, getting a heinous period, doing extremely physical work for days straight resulting in severe physical pain and jury duty, I�m feeling very sorry for myself. Yes, life could be worse, but life could also definitely be better. They called me from Florida and I didn�t answer, another friend called me last night and I didn�t answer, several of them emailed me yesterday and today and I didn�t respond and I�m not going to Girls Night tonight (it�s a special night because of the Big Brother finale). There was an evite sent out and I didn�t have time at work today to include a comment with my �no� response (we had a tree fall down on live power lines in the backyard and had to do clean up all day � yes, more work fun), and the girl hosting the party emailed me and called me to see what was wrong (and no, I didn�t answer). My whole response is going to be, �Sorry, I was just so busy this week, I didn�t have time to respond. Last week? It was a great week. Jury duty was so fun. I wish I could get my period every week. Yeah, I do look really pasty next to all of you, but didn�t you hear? Pale is the new tan. Can I have another shot please?� I think that�s better than me crying when they talk about their vacation and then blubbering on for hours about how I a). don�t have money; b). how I�m too fat; c). how I haven�t been on vacation in YEARS. I don�t want to be that girl. I hate that girl. I think I�m also in a funk because I don�t want it to be my birthday (it�s on Friday). I hate my birthday. I don�t really like being the center of attention anyway, so I feel funny about it sometimes. I also don�t want to be older. I�m turning 28 and even though I know it�s not OLD, I just don�t want to be 30. Getting older really scares me. I haven�t done anything yet. Also, Jeremy doesn�t have money to buy me a present. And truly, that�s fine. I don�t care about the present at all. What bothers me is that everyone will ask me what he got me. I hate that I have to say, �Nothing� and then talk about how poor we are for the next few minutes. Maybe I�ll buy something for myself, wrap it up and have him give it to me so I don�t have to say nothing. His birthday is in November and our 2 year anniversary is in October so we were thinking about not really celebrating birthday�s this year (just because we�re poor not because we don�t want to) and save our money for our anniversary. Then it�ll be a celebration for both of us�we�ll see. But yeah, this week is going to be busy too. Tonight and tomorrow night, I�m avoiding the phones, Thursday my parent�s are taking me and Jeremy to dinner (anywhere I want � I�m thinking Ruth�s Chris, but it�s not as fun going there when you�re on a diet), I�m off Friday during the day and my mom and I are going to spend the day together (her birthday is on Saturday), Friday night, Jeremy and I are celebrating my birthday alone (he might make me dinner, give me a massage, etc) and Saturday I�m going out with friends and Jeremy (everyone keeps asking me what I want to do, but I haven�t decided yet � the only thing that sounds remotely good at this point is just not celebrating) and Sunday is the Colts game. So yeah, I�ve been really busy, but it�s been nothing exciting or really even good. I�m just glad last week is over. I had been dreading it for months. This event is something we do every year and I told my boss on Saturday that it was my last year doing it or even having anything to do with it (I don�t even want to help) and if that means having to leave the company, then so be it. That�s how bad it is. Hopefully after this week, life will return back to normal. Actually, better than normal would be a nice change. 9:41 a.m. - September 21, 2005 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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